Reclaiming Your Identity: The Hidden Key to Personal and Collective Transformation
you can always change what you see
Who Are You Beneath the Stories?
Somewhere along the way, you were given a name.
A role.
A story to live by.
You were told what was possible for you.
Who you should be.
What you should want.
But what if those stories were never really yours?
What if the limitations you’ve accepted aren’t truth—but inherited scripts passed down by society, culture, and past experiences?
If who you are shapes what you allow yourself to experience, then reclaiming your identity isn’t just personal—it’s revolutionary.
The Stories That Shape Us (And The Ones That Keep Us Stuck)
We like to believe that we are the authors of our own lives. But the truth?
Most of us are living by a script we never consciously wrote.
These stories come from:
Family conditioning: “People like us don’t do things like that.”
Cultural norms: “You have to be practical. Secure. Realistic.”
Early experiences: “You’re too much.” “You’re not enough.”
And without realizing it, these stories become our identities.
Not because they’re true— But because they’re familiar.
How many of us limit ourselves to what we know? Or what we have been told is allowed?
Feel good about yourself— nope, that’s arrogant. Feel deep down you have a big calling— nope, that’s narcissistic. Feel you want to be wealthy and fund great causes— nope, that’s greedy and evil.
The list goes on and on, but until we challenge these identities, we can never truly break free and live the way we were meant to be.
And the fact is, most of us know this, but we may not know why we can’t seem to LIVE in this truth.
I spent much of my time in my youth (and adulthood) believing I was defective and unlovable and that the only way I could get any sort of care or attention was to be a perfectionist, constantly producing pleasing outcomes for everyone. Childhood sexual abuse and many other trials and tribulations pushed me to my limits of self-hatred and punishment. I identified with being a victim who was simply undeserving of anything good in life unless I ‘earned’ it. The problem is, ‘the earning, producing or performing’ never was enough, and I exhausted myself trying to make it enough.
I didn’t realize that I was living out of an identity that should never have been mine to carry— and I didn’t know how to let it go.
The Hidden Reason Change Feels Impossible
Let’s say you want to change your life—become more confident, successful, or free.
You set goals. Take action. Try new habits.
But something keeps pulling you back.
Why?
Because your subconscious mind is wired to protect your current identity.
If you still see yourself as “the struggling one,” you’ll subconsciously create struggle.
If you still see yourself as “the one who always fails,” you’ll find ways to prove it true.
If you still believe success, love, or happiness isn’t for you, you’ll block yourself from receiving it.
It is the infamous self-fullfilling prophecy at play. This can really limit our life if we keep reinforcing false narratives.
The real shift doesn’t come from changing habits or working harder. It comes from changing how you see yourself.
Until I learned to see myself in a different light, or should I say start believing deep down I was already the person I wanted to be, I would constantly chase external means to give me internal worth.
It is good to still aspire to grow and develop in our virtues, skills and values as a person, but when we completely reject who we are and don’t show compassion for the adaptations we had to do at one point just to survive, we are really just disregarding our value as a human being— one who is here, and has always been here, on purpose— for a purpose.
Reclaiming Your Identity: The Shift from Survival to Liberation
Instead of saying, “I need to become a new person,” say, “I need to return to who I was before the world told me who to be.”
This isn’t about forcing yourself into a new version of you. It’s about releasing the layers that aren’t yours and stepping into your natural, unfiltered power.
It’s about unlearning.
A Shedding.
A Reclaiming.
Because the most powerful version of you has always been there—waiting to be seen, not hidden, made small, or silent.
I had to learn to start making choices that were closer to the true me, not the ‘maladaptive patterns’ me— and this all started with choosing to change what I would see.
Carl Rogers developed a self-concept triangle. The self-concept triangle has three components— self-image, self-esteem and the ideal self. Our self-image is how we see ourselves and how we believe others see us. Our ideal self is the version of ourselves we desire to be. I also argue that we already are this person but are blocked from accessing it by old conditioning and this is the work of the self. The farther the gap between our self-image and our ideal self, the lower our self-esteem (the way we feel about ourselves).
If we identify with only the negative or not ideal parts of us, and feel others see us in the same dim light, we will continue to play small. And here's the thing, if we were told this from a young age or experienced trauma or adversity early and frequent, this negative self-image (and thus identity) is only reinforced. We then tend to desperately cling to our ideal self even though we feel so far from that deep down. But we aren’t. I believe our ideal self is the true us that we don’t allow. Once we start allowing and living in alignment to this ‘self’, we strengthen, evolve and grow whilst accepting and honoring who we truly are. Our esteem goes up, our quality of life goes up and so does our ability to make our impact here.
Another fun concept to apply here is the deep work of Jungian archetypes. We each have 12 archetypes that we universally resonate with, but we tend to have dominant types. These archetypes we resonate with and can utilize or embody as our ideal self, especially if we are seeking transformation. The identity of these archetypes paint to our subconscious the fullest expression of who we aim to be, and we can align with them to catalyze any transformation in our life.
No matter what you utilize to align with your identity, though, it is always going to be influenced by the way you choose to see yourself. The way you see yourself will profoundly persuade the narrative and destiny for your life— as well as for the collective.
I created a fun quiz here to find yours if you would like to explore and get started on your alchemy archetype blueprint.
Rise Into Who You Are
Take the quiz and unlock your TRUE identity. Receive fun ways to embody your archetype and get a jump start on your alchemy journey.
The Ripple Effect: Why Your Identity Shift Changes the World
When your reclaim your true identity, it doesn’t just impact your personal life.
It affects:
Your relationships—because you stop playing small and start showing up fully.
Your career & purpose—because you stop settling and start aligning.
The collective—because personal liberation is contagious.
History is proof of this.
The Identity Shift That Reshaped an Entire Generation
During the Civil Rights Movement, activists like Rosa Parks, James Baldwin, and Malcolm X didn’t just demand change—they first reclaimed their identity.
They rejected the stories that said they had to accept less.
They chose a new reality before it existed.
Their internal shift led to a collective revolution.
When one person embraces their power, they create a ripple effect that changes everything.
This is why your transformation isn’t just for you.
The more people step into their truth, the more systems, narratives, and outdated limitations dissolve.
Challenge yourself to see differently, and watch your life change drastically.
So how do we start?
The 3-Step Identity Shift Framework
Step 1: Identify the Stories You’ve Inherited
What labels, roles, or beliefs have you accepted as truth?
Who gave them to you?
Are they actually yours?
Can you even hear the voice of the exact person who planted those seeds of words in your mind?
Step 2: Create an Identity Statement That Aligns With Your Truth
Instead of “I’ve always been this way,” say, “I am expanding into my true self.”
Instead of “I don’t know how,” say, “I’m becoming someone who figures it out.”
Instead of “I wish I was more confident,” say, “Confidence is something I already carry.”
Step 3: Take One Action That Reinforces This Identity
If your highest self already existed (which they do— it’s how you wish you would respond or do instead of how you are defaulting from old narratives), how would they act today?
What small shift can you make right now in your perspective?
What is the next best action to take to close the gap between your self-image and your ideal self?
Your archetype holds the blueprint for this shift. If you haven’t taken the quiz yet, now is the time.
Final Reflection: Your Identity is the Key to Your Freedom
The greatest act of personal and collective liberation is reclaiming your truth by reinstating your identity.
Because the world doesn’t need more people playing small. It needs people who remember who they are and show up unapologetically— shedding the layers that has held them back far too long.
None of us are doing anyone a favor by diminishing our own value. And when we KNOW our value, we honor the value of others, and believe in the work we must do here— and that is how we empower the change we so desperately need to see in our world today.
Remember, your identity is simply the way you see yourself— and you can choose to swap the lenses any time.
Drop a comment: What’s one old identity you’re ready to release?
If you’re ready to discover your transformation path, take the free Alchemy Archetype Quiz now. Your next evolution is waiting.
Leaving you with love,
xoxo,
Mandi